Spilt Orange Juice

We're not supposed to cry over spilt milk.  But my daughter didn't spill her milk.  It was orange juice.  And the tears came.  Not from her, but from me. 

Not a big deal, orange juice washes out of a table cloth.  And most people come to expect a 2 year old to spill their drinks more often than not.  But my 2 year old is different.  It wasn't her young hands that failed her, it was her brain.  She had a seizure.  One of many she has every day.

We are one and a half years into a diagnosis process.  A diagnosis of epilepsy.

And I'm tired.

I'm tired physically.  From dragging a two year old, and at times the whole family, to doctors appointments and new hospitals.  From adminstering medicine over and over, day after day, sometimes easily, sometimes with a difficult two year old who likes to make things challenging.  I'm tired, mentally, from trying to make decisions about treatment.  From racking my brain for answers that will most likely never be there.    From trying to understand what doctors go to school for years to understand.  I'm tired emotionally.  From anger at old doctors who seem to have not done all they could to find an answer.  From trying to stay calm when "explaining" that someone might see something unusual with my daughter every so often, but don't worry.  She's fine.  Tired from knowing she's not fine.  Tired from trying not to freak out when grandparents react to what I must pretend not to notice every. single. day. to keep life "normal" for my kids.  Tired from seeing other kids who are suffering much more than my child and there is nothing I can do about it.

I'm tired.  And it is so hard to be strong when you are tired, but strong I must be.  Strong for my children because they don't know that their sister has something "wrong" with her.  And they shouldn't.  Strong for my husband or else he would have to carry this weight on his shoulders alone.  Strong for our extended family who do react.  Because they care.  They don't know how to not care, which of course makes us blessed.

We are so very blessed.  Blessed to have a new doctor who is eager to get answers.  Blessed to have an amazing hospital nearby that is full of people who not only want sick kids to get better, but to smile as much as possible while they get better.  Blessed to have a beautiful daughter who is so full of life that she makes us laugh more than enough to make us forget her "issues" most of the time.

But most importantly, blessed to have a Father who, though I forget to turn to Him all of the time, never forgets to be there for me.  To tell me to "Be Not Afraid."  I've had to cling to this scripture over the last year and a half.  Because I am afraid, a lot.  But there really is no reason to be afraid.  Because God's plan is perfect.  And as long as I can remember that, there is peace. 

And I can always buy more orange juice. 

Be a Burning Light

"If we remember that God loves us, and that we can love others as He loves us, then America can become a sign of peace for the world. From here, a sign of care for the weakest of the weak - the unborn child - must go out to the world. If you become a burning light of justice and peace in the world, then really you will be true to what the founders of this country stood for. God bless you!"

~ Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta, National Prayer Breakfast 1994

from OrthodoxyToday.org

It's Not About Me

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths. ~Proverbs 3:5-6

Grace, Not Perfection

I'm Just Not That Important

For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope. Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all your heart... ~Jeremiah 29:11-13

How Do You...?

How do you teach your kids the concept of a morning offering?

First of all, let me say that I struggle with this practice myself. And since this was not something done in my house growing up, I'm kind of winging it. I only have one child who reads so far, so the idea of morning Bible time is not realistic for us, yet. And forget anything requiring self-discipline with our 2 year old. We are still working on making the bed, and that's something tangible, something she can see and touch to understand. So how do you teach and enforce a proper way for your children to start their day by giving it to the Lord?

In our house, I'm really trying to develop habits in my kids, so I knew some kind of prayer routine would be needed. Since my kids all need some degree of help to get ready in the morning, I am all over the place. Until breakfast. So I decided to incorporate our offering of our day into our breakfast prayer. But, again, not having anything from my past to fall back on, I found myself writing a prayer for this purpose. Crazy, I know! I knew it had to be simple, both to be able to learn, and to understand, and I also know how the girls like rhyming. This is what I came up with:

Thank you, God, for this food

And for all who made it taste so good.

And thank you, Lord, for this special day,

That we may please* you in all we do and say.

Be with us from up above

So we can share your awesome love.

Amen!

The girls love it! They want to say it at lunch and dinner, too. Kind of defeats the idea of a "morning" offering, huh?

So, again, I ask, how do YOU, or do you, teach your children the concept of giving each day to the Lord? Please leave your comment, or even a link to a post you may want to write about this idea.

I can't wait to learn from you!

*(I'm thinking about changing the "please" to "serve." What do you think?)

Checking In and Prayer Requests

We've made it to Virginia and are trying to set up house as fast as we can, hoping to have as normal a living space as possible before the baby comes. The last month has been a whirlwind between traveling 2/3 of the country, sleeping in multiple places, learning our way around our new "hometown" and just being VERY PREGNANT. I also managed to catch some nasty virus that has made me even less helpful to my husband over the last couple of weeks. The good news is that I'm starting to feel better and we are making progress on the house. Obviously, all of this "adventure" has kept me from blogging. And it's just been over the last few nights that I've been on my computer to read my usual blogs. I think I had 300 posts waiting for me in Reader. So bear with me as I catch up. While you are so patiently waiting for me to post something new, if you could say a prayer that Baby stays put for a little while longer, so we can get the house "finished," (is a house ever finished?) we would appreciate it. I'm definitely okay with an on-time arrival this go-round. But more importantly, if you could pray for another baby to stay put until he/she is supposed to. Do you read Kate's blog? If not, I highly recommend it!

Happy Independence Day! Stay safe!


Oh...and while I may not be posting much myself, as I get caught up with my favorite blogs, I will still be sharing my favorite posts under my Shared Items. So don't hesitate to check in to see what other brilliant bloggers are saying!

Holy Father's Prayer Intentions for May

General Intention: That those who work in the media may always respect truth, solidarity and the dignity of each person.

Missionary Intention: That the Lord may grant the Church in China the capacity to persevere in fidelity to the Gospel and to grow in unity.

The Holy Father's Prayer Intentions for September

The Word of God as Sign of Social Development
General: That in less developed parts of the world the proclamation of the Word of God may renew people's hearts, encouraging them to work actively toward authentic social progress.

The End of War
Missionary: That by opening our hearts to love we may put an end to the numerous wars and conflicts which continue to bloody our world.

The Holy Father's Prayer Intentions for August

The Unemployed and Homeless
General: That those who are without work or homes or who are otherwise in serious need may find understanding and welcome, as well as concrete help in overcoming their difficulties.

Victims of Discrimination, Hunger and Forced Emigration
Missionary: That the Church may be a "home" for all people, ready to open its doors to any who are suffering from racial or religious discrimination, hunger, or wars forcing them to emigrate to other countries.

Rosary for Children

Does anyone have a preferred version of the Rosary on cd that would be good for young children? Isabel starts preschool soon, and the morning drive would be a great time to pray the Rosary with the girls.

Prayer of St. Gianna

God our Father we praise You and we bless you because in St. Gianna Beretta Molla you have given us one who witnessed to the Gospel as a young woman, as a wife, as a mother, and as a doctor. We thank you because through the gift of her life we can learn to welcome and honor every human person.

You, Lord Jesus, were for Gianna a splendid example. She learned to recognize you in the beauty of nature. As she was questioning her choice of vocation she went in search of you and the best way to serve you. Through her married love she became a sign of your love for the Church and for humanity. Like you, the Good Samaritan, she cared for everyone who was sick, small or weak. Following your example, out of love she gave herself entirely, generating new life.

Holy Spirit, Source of every perfection, give us wisdom, intelligence, and courage so that, following the example of St. Gianna and through her intercession, we may know how to place ourselves at the service of each person we meet in our personal, family and professional lives, and thus grow in love and holiness. Amen.

For more information on St. Gianna, visit SaintGianna.org.

Prayer Request Details

I received an email from my friend today about the status of her daughter and the news is heartbreaking. Without going into too many details, the baby is in a drug-induced coma so that the doctors can stabilize her. Once she is stable enough to do more testing, they fear they will find severe brain damage. Please, please pray for everyone involved. My friend says it is between baby and God now.

URGENT PRAYER REQUEST

I received a text message today from friend of mine. Although it wasn't full of details, what I got from it is that her newborn baby, born 2 days ago, is in the NICU "fighting for her life." Please, if you can, say a prayer for my friend and her new daughter and their family.

Thank you.

Getting Me Through

Mary, Help Me

Holy Queen, Mother of mothers, consolation and protectress of all Christian motherhood, Mother Mary, help me.

In all the trials and sorrows that come into my day, dear Mary, help me.

When I am tired with my labors and despondency is upon me, dear Mary, help me.

When all looks dark and I find none to speak a consoling or cheering word, dear Mary, help me.

When I am wearied by the weight of countless vexing little things and my patience is sorely tried, dear Mary, help me.

In the impatience and rudeness of others, by the example of your mildness, dear Mary, help me.

When others speak sharply to me and I would speak harshly in return, that I may show the gentleness of your own kindly speech, dear Mary, help me.

When my efforts seem to bear so little fruit and to be so little appreciated and I am discouraged, dear Mary, help me.

When a thousand worrisome distractions and annoyances come into my day and it seems so hard to keep my peace of heart, dear Mary, help me.

When all others seem to fail, then especially with the sweet support of your gentle aid, dear Mary, help me.

In all things, Mother, assist me! That I may, like you, with patience turn all my trials into spiritual treasures; that I may grow ever more like you, the cherished queen of the most holy family, dear Mary, help me!

From the Mothers' Manual by A. Francis coomes, S.J.